It’s a fairly common phenomenon on teen dramas to witness a parent-child relationship that is characterized by some form of role reversal. This can mean anything from a responsible teen keeping their immature parent in check to an over-extended teen taking care of the household.
I began thinking about the dynamics of such “backwards” relationships in the context of Absolutely Fabulous, and Gilmore Girls, in which a single mother is characterized as reckless and fun-loving, while her 16-year old daughter is studious, rational, and mature. In these cases, while daughter does not take on the responsibilities of the functioning household, it is frequently implied that she could. Roles are often reversed in conversation, and the way the two interact.
These relatively moderate examples led me to think about other situations that put teens in the care-giving role, such as on Beverly Hills, 90210 when Kelly feels responsible for taking care of her drug-addict mother, and Friday Night Lights, where Vince likewise pays the bills and brings home food for the table when his mother is too strung out to notice the power’s been shut off.
Friday Night Lights is actually full of examples of parental role reversal. From Tyra whose mother tries to get her to stop studying and have fun, to Smash, who promises to take care of his mom and sisters once he makes it in the pros, and Matt, who becomes an emancipated minor in order to take care of his aging grandmother.
While I could go on and trawl my brain for more examples (like Buffy, who is often protecting her mother and keeping her safe from demons!) the primary reason I bring this up should have become apparent by now.
Why is it, that when teens are forced into the position of taking care of a parent, the one who needs protection or care is always a single mother?
Is it that fathers escape any need for nurturing from their child? Or do children cast off and ignore irresponsible fathers, while feeling protective towards a mother in need? Or do father’s fail by leaving, while a mother’s failure is to drop the ball at home?
Ultimately, why is it that so many mothers (specifically those without the support of a husband) are depicted as incapable of upholding their role as care-giver and parent? Is it a plot-device? A simple solution to the question, how do we put our teen hero(ine) in a stressful situation? And if so, how do these shows manage to consistently infantilize women (but not men), without realizing or acknowledging the inherent sexism in such narratives?
